‘Winning’… America’s real national pastime

Remember when a drug-addled Charlie Sheen bizarrely declared over and over that he was “winning” in the midst of a very public meltdown?

We now know that Sheen’s bizarre behavior was false euphoria caused by drugs he was using in an effort to forget that a consequence of the reckless lifestyle which defined his bad boy persona was the contraction of a disease that would change his life forever.

Well, right now America is Charlie Sheen circa 2011.

Think about it.

Recent developments in U.S. foreign policy make clear that the White House has moved on from its promise to make America great again by focusing on domestic policies. Why? Well, it’s not incredibly clear what happened…

There’s the possibility that Trump entered the presidency overconfident in his ability to negotiate away congressional hurdles as we saw with the failed attempt to repeal Obamacare and replace it with a truly conservative alternative.

Who knew healthcare was so complicated, the president said.

And we’ll see more of this as the administration attempts to move forward: on the wall, the tax code, infrastructure…

These things are hard, the swamp is deep.

Meanwhile, the disease that is U.S. foreign policy will continue to worsen, as it has been for several years— and, no matter what he says, one man can’t undo 50 years of bad policy from the Oval Office. And if he tried to do so against the odds, he’d be met with the swift pushback from a deeply entrenched establishment with a lot to lose.

We know that’s true because we just saw it happen.

Trump wanted to normalize relations with Russia… all of a sudden we learned that Russian operatives hacked the U.S. election.

Trump promised to get the U.S. out of the regime change business… and suddenly a guy with nothing to gain by pissing off the world was gassing beautiful babies.

There’s no evidence that the president was insincere in his promises to the American people during the election season, only that he oversold his ability to deliver. In fairness, he probably didn’t understand just how dangerous life is for a contrarian president. Maybe his buddy Roger Stone should have loaned the current president a copy of that book he wrote about JFK… maybe he did. That would clear up many questions currently coming from Trump’s former base—you know, the basket of deporables.

But Trump is a salesman and an expert marketer. If that’s your business, you’d better know how to identify a new market when one dries up or becomes impossible to please because of uncontrollable variables. It’s that or starve… or in Trump’s case, it’s that or become his worst nightmare: A Big Fat Loser.

Trump’s new market is the same establishment that wanted Hillary Clinton’s brand of foreign policy to continue beyond the election.

And, according to that establishment, are we winning.

In a particularly disgusting segment that just aired on Fox News, human mustache Geraldo Rivera joined the cast of Fox and Friends in a conversation about how he loves the smell of napalm in the morning… or, at least, that may as well have been what he said.

“Well one of my favorite things in the 16 years I’ve been here at Fox News is watching bombs drop on bad guys,” Rivera said.

Oh yes, his hosts agreed, we’re winning.

Winning with no idea at all how to reverse our foreign policy disease… We claim to be making good on promises to “bomb the ****” out of ISIS with the recent display in Afghanistan; meanwhile, we strengthen ISIS’s foothold in Syria with attacks on a government airstrip.

Now, North Korea is on notice and the world is watching… get ready for more winning and more praise from the establishment. And prepare for another sore that just won’t seem to heal.

Eventually the U.S. will, like Sheen, be forced to admit that it’s sick and simply attempting to maintain a persona.

Until then, the nation will justify its foreign policy in the same way Sheen once attempted to explain how he expected to survive continuing his insane lifestyle despite the obvious health risks: “I am different. I just have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart, I have a different… you know… I have tiger blood, man!”

(Since Sheen’s inevitable mea culpa, it should be noted he’s made a pretty graceful return to the public stage.)

It’s an incredible time to be paying attention to national U.S. politics, if only because we currently have a president whose long life as a public personality has given him the opportunity to comment for the record on just about anything that’s made headlines over the past several decades.

And, you’re not going to believe this, but Trump even weighed in on Sheen’s breakdown during an appearance on the Late Show With David Letterman in 2011.

“We’ve seen worse,” Trump said, adding that the publicity Sheen was getting with all his talk of “winning” was actually a good thing.

If things keep going the way they are, that’ll become a fitting slogan for Republicans looking ahead to 2020: What the hell, we’ve seen worse.

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